Memory Lane
Note: I've moved my blog to my own web site - the new address is:
www.nonaverage.net/insomanywords/
Comments can only be left at the new location.
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Several years ago I knew this man who was a very intelligent guy. He was born in Southern California - his father was from New Mexico and was Hispanic and Native American, and his mother was born in Mexico City. Not surprisingly, Spanish was his first language, but by the time he was a young adult he had learned to speak English fluently and taught himself to speak without an accent. He enlisted in the U.S. Air Force and eventually became a 2nd Lieutenant and a pilot, flying those large cargo planes and taking skydivers up for training. At some point the Air Force doctors discovered that he had a congenital heart defect - a hole in one of his heart valves - and they grounded him which, as I was later told, was a big disappointment for him. Back in civilian life, he taught himself things like auto repair, electronics, television repair and even some carpentry. He made extra money by fixing old tube stereo amplifiers and televisions in his spare time. He once ordered one of those entertainment center kits - unfinished wood and electronic parts - and he built and finished the cabinets and assembled and installed the stereo amp, and it ended up looking and working great. He got a job as a civilian employee at a U.S. Navy base, and he went to college at night on the VA Bill to help him get promotions. He owned an older house on a 1/2 acre of land and remodeled it himself, and built (as in, he sawed/hammered/roofed) a two-story garage/shop in the back yard which was where he restored his 1967 Cadillac. He was a coach for his son's sports team - overall he and his wife were pretty involved in their son's life, and his family was quite devastated when he died in 1998 of complications from a seizure.
I also knew a man who wasn't as involved in his children's lives. This man was one of those people who carried a lot of anger inside most of his life. Now this man had had a very cruel father, a father who beat him and his siblings, a father who cheated on the man's mother. Eventually this man's father left the man's mother and family for another woman and started another family. So this man, who was the oldest child, was left to be the "father" of his home, which probably had a lot to do with the anger this man lived with, but even as an adult he never found a healthy way to release his anger. He married a county girl from Kentucky and they had a son, but the man's anger soon revealed itself in their marriage. One day, the young son was on the floor of their home playing with a new toy truck given to him by a sweet older neighbor lady. The man came home from work and asked the son where the new toy had come from. The son told the man that the neighbor lady had given it as a gift. The man didn't like the neighbor lady - he had told his wife that he didn't want her talking to the neighbor lady - so when the son told the man who the toy had come from, the man walked over, lifted his foot and crushed the toy, right in front of the son. That is the earliest memory that the son has of the man. Later, more children were born, another boy and three girls, and as they got older and needed discipline like all children do, the man began to be more and more harsh with the children, and eventually the man started beating his children. And the man also started beating his wife and cheating on her. And he later left her with the children and started a new family with another woman.
And the smart guy and the angry man have something in common - they were both my father.
But everybody's scared of this place...
www.nonaverage.net/insomanywords/
Comments can only be left at the new location.
----------------------------------------------------
Several years ago I knew this man who was a very intelligent guy. He was born in Southern California - his father was from New Mexico and was Hispanic and Native American, and his mother was born in Mexico City. Not surprisingly, Spanish was his first language, but by the time he was a young adult he had learned to speak English fluently and taught himself to speak without an accent. He enlisted in the U.S. Air Force and eventually became a 2nd Lieutenant and a pilot, flying those large cargo planes and taking skydivers up for training. At some point the Air Force doctors discovered that he had a congenital heart defect - a hole in one of his heart valves - and they grounded him which, as I was later told, was a big disappointment for him. Back in civilian life, he taught himself things like auto repair, electronics, television repair and even some carpentry. He made extra money by fixing old tube stereo amplifiers and televisions in his spare time. He once ordered one of those entertainment center kits - unfinished wood and electronic parts - and he built and finished the cabinets and assembled and installed the stereo amp, and it ended up looking and working great. He got a job as a civilian employee at a U.S. Navy base, and he went to college at night on the VA Bill to help him get promotions. He owned an older house on a 1/2 acre of land and remodeled it himself, and built (as in, he sawed/hammered/roofed) a two-story garage/shop in the back yard which was where he restored his 1967 Cadillac. He was a coach for his son's sports team - overall he and his wife were pretty involved in their son's life, and his family was quite devastated when he died in 1998 of complications from a seizure.
I also knew a man who wasn't as involved in his children's lives. This man was one of those people who carried a lot of anger inside most of his life. Now this man had had a very cruel father, a father who beat him and his siblings, a father who cheated on the man's mother. Eventually this man's father left the man's mother and family for another woman and started another family. So this man, who was the oldest child, was left to be the "father" of his home, which probably had a lot to do with the anger this man lived with, but even as an adult he never found a healthy way to release his anger. He married a county girl from Kentucky and they had a son, but the man's anger soon revealed itself in their marriage. One day, the young son was on the floor of their home playing with a new toy truck given to him by a sweet older neighbor lady. The man came home from work and asked the son where the new toy had come from. The son told the man that the neighbor lady had given it as a gift. The man didn't like the neighbor lady - he had told his wife that he didn't want her talking to the neighbor lady - so when the son told the man who the toy had come from, the man walked over, lifted his foot and crushed the toy, right in front of the son. That is the earliest memory that the son has of the man. Later, more children were born, another boy and three girls, and as they got older and needed discipline like all children do, the man began to be more and more harsh with the children, and eventually the man started beating his children. And the man also started beating his wife and cheating on her. And he later left her with the children and started a new family with another woman.
And the smart guy and the angry man have something in common - they were both my father.
But everybody's scared of this place...
posted by Ruben at
3:39 PM
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